THE EMBARRASSED FAMILY

The 91-year old patriarch of a large family in Taiwan was dying. His
eight children, their spouses and all the grandchildren assembled at the
family home in order to be present when the old man passed into
eternity.

A day or two after the clan has assembled, the patriarch took his last
breath. The mother of the family, who had been calm throughout the
crisis, broke into hysterical weeping. She grabbed her husband's body
and tried to lift him. She tore at her hair and scratched her face. It
took all four of her daughters to physically restrain their
grief-stricken mother and lead her from the death chamber back to her
own room.

All night long, the widow howled and shrieked until, an hour or so
before dawn, emotional exhaustion overcame her grief and she fell
asleep.

Her children were distraught. Her grandchildren were terrified. So the
eldest son called a family conference while their mother slept. "I have
never seen Mother like this", he said. "I don't think anyone has ever
seen Mother like this", said his eldest sister. "Nor should anyone", the
eldest son said. "that's why I think we should go to the herbalist and
get a sedative so Mother will be able to control her emotions at the
funeral".

The suggestion made good sense to everyone. No one wanted the
embarrassment of seeing their mother carry on in this manner at their
father's funeral. The next day, the eldest daughter went to the
herbalist's store. The herbalist was an old friend of the family. He
sympathized with the daughter over the loss of her father, and seemed
genuinely shocked to hear that her mother has lost control of her
emotions. "This will calm your dear Mother", she said as he handed a
small bottle to the woman. "It's a strong sedative, but if you put five
drops in a pot of tea that will dilute it. After she drinks one cup, she
will be more herself again. Calm, but alert. Remember - five drops. No
more".

The next morning was the day of the funeral. The house was in confusion
as more and more relatives and friends arrived to pay their last
respects. The eldest daughter was determined to prepare her mother's tea
herself., but she endured constant interruptions. Newly arrived mourners
asked to see her. Her child seemed unusually demanding. Her husband
couldn't find his best shoes.

At last, she had a moment to herself. She took out the small bottle from
the herbalist and put five drops in her mother's teapot as the herbalist
had instructed. But given her mother's condition, it really didn't seem
like enough. So she added three more drops to the tea. She was about to
screw the cap back on the bottle when she heard her mother begin to weep
hysterically once more. "Well, she thought, "a couple more drops can't
hurt".

Finally, with ten drops of the sedative in the tea, the daughter carried
the teapot and a small porcelain cup to her mother's room. Her mother
was wrapped in a dressing gown, sobbing in a chair beside the window.

"Good morning, Mother. Did you get any rest last night?" the daughter
asked. The grief-stricken woman did not say a word, she just gestured to
her daughter to leave the tea on a table beside her bed. The daughter
kissed her mother on the forehead and left. Two house later, the entire
family was ready for the funeral, but the mother had not come out of her
room yet. Her daughter knocked. There was no answer. She called softly,
"Mother?" There was no response. She called more loudly, but her mother
still did not come to the door.

At last, the daughter opened the door. Sitting in a chair beside the
window was her mother, cold and dead. On the bedside was the teapot,
completely empty. The old woman had every drop of the overdosed tea.